Our Flubbered Economy

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Department store sales per employee and adjusted for inflation are going parabolic! Yay.

September 26, 2013
Fox Business News: JCP Shares Rebound; Retailer Pleased with Progress

Retailer J.C. Penney Co Inc (JCP) said it was pleased with the progress of its turnaround efforts and still expected positive comparable-store sales trends coming out of the third quarter and throughout the fourth.

The headline actually makes sense! Way to go Fox Business News!

The cost to insure $10 million of J.C. Penney bonds against a default for five years now requires an upfront payment of about $2.2 million plus quarterly payments of about $300,000 for the duration of the contract. The contract's pricing reflects a default probability of nearly 65 percent.

The retailer must be very pleased indeed! Let's look closely at the rebound in shares too while we are at it. Shares fell a whopping 15% yesterday and are currently bouncing back up 3% today. Yes, indeed! Very pleasing!

September 24, 2013
Sears Canada CEO to leave amid clash over revamp

In a surprise move, Sears Canada Inc. chief executive officer Calvin McDonald is leaving more than two years after having spearheaded a transformation of the struggling retailer, raising questions about its revival in the industry’s increasingly tough landscape.

Boo! Hiss!

Sources familiar with the situation said the departure was sparked over differing views with parent Sears Holdings Corp., whose controlling shareholder is Edward Lampert. The disagreement was tied to “the pace at which capital was being deployed to keep the momentum of the transformation going,” according to a source.

Boo! Hiss!

What about Macy's? No need to worry! That stock's been on fire lately! Just like it was in 1999 and 2007! What's the worst that could happen?


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Macy's stock has been flubbered! To infinity and beyond!

Flubber is a non-Newtonian fluid that flows under low stress, but breaks under higher stresses and pressures.

No more stress! No more pressure! From here on out, it's nothing but exponentially increasing corporate profits! Thanks to this new and improved Fed, recessions will never be tolerated again! Hurray!

Flubber trends were first discovered by Rob Dawg in the comments found here. Genius!

Source Data:
St. Louis Fed: Custom Chart
Yahoo Finance: Macy's Historical Prices
St. Louis Fed: CPI